New Wine

Few ideas lie as close to the heart of Christianity as the concept of a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. It is not merely a phrase or a trend—it is the central theme of the gospel, woven through the scriptures from Genesis to Revelation. Yet, when something so profound is reduced to a misguided critique that appeals to gendered stereotypes, it demands a thorough response. The claim that a personal relationship with Christ is a concept designed to cater to "a woman's deepest desire" for a loving man not only diminishes the universality of the gospel but fundamentally misrepresents the heart of God’s purpose for humanity.

This article was provoked by something my beautiful wife came across on social media where someone posted this claim—"...despite its extrabiblical roots, personal relationship with Jesus Christ has become the number one term Evangelicals use to describe the Christian walk. Why? Because it frames the gospel in terms of a woman's deepest desire— a personal relationship with a man who loves her unconditionally. It's imagery that delights women-and baffles men."

Let us explore what scripture teaches about the personal relationship with God—Father, Son, and Holy Spirit—and why this invitation is for every man, woman, and child, transcending all societal constructs and stereotypes.

The Call to Intimacy with God Is Universal

From the very beginning, God’s intention was clear: humanity was created to dwell in communion with Him. In the Garden of Eden, before sin entered the world, Adam and Eve walked with God in the cool of the day. This imagery in Genesis 3:8 paints a picture of deep fellowship—unbroken intimacy between Creator and creation. It was not merely a functional relationship but one of delight, love, and shared presence.

This desire for communion did not end with the fall of humanity. Throughout scripture, God reveals Himself as a loving Father who relentlessly pursues His children. The psalmist captures this yearning beautifully:

“You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.” (Psalm 16:11)

This longing for God is not a gendered emotion. It is a fundamental human response to the One who made us. David, a warrior and king, poured out his soul in psalms that express a deep hunger for God’s presence:

“As the deer pants for flowing streams, so pants my soul for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.” (Psalm 42:1-2)

If we reduce this longing to a “woman’s deepest desire,” we risk sidelining the countless men throughout scripture and history who have walked closely with God. Moses, Joshua, David, Daniel, and countless others knew the joy and necessity of intimacy with their Creator. Their lives were marked not by bafflement but by courage, faith, and obedience born out of a deep relationship with God.

Jesus Christ’s Mission: To Restore Relationship

The gospel is, at its core, an invitation back into relationship with God. Through sin, humanity became alienated from Him, but Jesus Christ came to bridge that gap. His mission was not merely to secure forgiveness but to restore the intimacy that was lost in Eden.

Jesus Himself spoke of this relationship in terms of intimacy and knowing:

“I am the good shepherd. I know my own and my own know me, just as the Father knows me and I know the Father.” (John 10:14-15)

The imagery of the shepherd is deeply personal. Shepherds in biblical times lived among their sheep, knew them by name, and were intimately involved in their care. This is the relationship Jesus offers—a relationship so close that He compares it to the perfect unity He shares with the Father.

In His ministry, Jesus repeatedly called individuals into personal relationship. To Zacchaeus, He said, “I must stay at your house today” (Luke 19:5), symbolizing His desire to enter not just a physical dwelling but the heart of a man despised by society. To Mary and Martha, He offered friendship that went beyond societal norms. To the disciples, He said,

“No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends.” (John 15:15)

Friendship with Jesus is not a shallow emotional appeal but an invitation into the deepest knowing—a shared life and purpose that transforms everything.

The Holy Spirit: The Indwelling Presence of God

When Jesus ascended to the Father, He did not leave us as orphans. Instead, He sent the Holy Spirit to dwell within us, making our relationship with God even more intimate. Paul emphasizes this reality:

“Do you not know that you are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in you?” (1 Corinthians 3:16)

The indwelling of the Holy Spirit is not a metaphor or abstract concept. It is the tangible reality of God living within His people, guiding, comforting, and empowering us to live holy lives. Through the Spirit, we cry, “Abba, Father” (Romans 8:15), a term of deep affection and intimacy that transcends gender or culture.

This relationship with the Holy Spirit transforms us into the image of Christ. It is not merely a personal comfort but the very source of power that equips men and women alike to fulfill God’s purposes on earth.

The Bride of Christ: A Collective Calling

One of the most striking metaphors in scripture is the Church as the Bride of Christ. This imagery, found in Ephesians 5:25-27 and Revelation 19:7, speaks of the covenantal love between Christ and His people. Far from being sentimental, it is a profound declaration of Christ’s sacrificial love and the purity He imparts to His Church.

The metaphor of the Bride is not aimed at women but at the collective Body of Christ. Men and women alike are called into this relationship, united as one to Christ. The imagery draws on the language of covenant and fidelity, reminding us that our relationship with Jesus is not a casual association but a bond of unbreakable love and faithfulness.

To dismiss this as “imagery that delights women” is to strip it of its biblical depth. The love of Christ for His Church is a love that calls men to lay down their lives in response, just as He laid down His life for us.

The Gospel’s Call to Men

The suggestion that men are “baffled” by the idea of a personal relationship with Christ is not only untrue but deeply demeaning. Scripture is replete with examples of men who knew God intimately and were transformed by that relationship. Abraham, the friend of God, walked in covenant with Him. Moses spoke with God face to face as one speaks to a friend (Exodus 33:11). David danced before the Lord with all his might, unashamed of his love for God (2 Samuel 6:14).

Paul, a former persecutor of Christians, became one of the greatest apostles through his encounter with Christ. He counted all things as loss compared to the surpassing worth of knowing Christ (Philippians 3:8). His letters are filled with the language of love and devotion, grounded in the reality of a deeply personal relationship with Jesus.

The gospel calls men to strength, courage, and leadership, but it begins with intimacy with God. A man who knows Christ personally is a man who can lead, serve, and love as Christ did.

A Gospel Too Big for Stereotypes

The claim that a personal relationship with Christ is primarily an appeal to women misunderstands the very nature of the gospel. The invitation to know God is universal, transcending gender, culture, and time. It speaks to the deepest need of every human heart—the need to be reconciled to our Creator.

The gospel is not a strategy or a sentiment. It is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes (Romans 1:16). It is the fulfillment of our purpose, the restoration of what was lost, and the promise of eternal communion with the One who loved us first (1 John 4:19).